Curing Fear
Posted: Monday, November 28, 2005
by Travis Lim
www.RendedWings.com
People have all sorts of fears. Fear of embarrassment, fear of people, fear of failing. Often times, friends or families try to relieve our fears by telling us "It's OK, there is nothing to be afraid of, its only XX" or "It's only in your imagination". We all know those remarks do very little to calm our nerves. Fear is real. Fear is not an imagination. Fear, uncertainty, lack of confidence explains why millions of people accomplish little , make little money, and enjoy little. Fear is the roadblock to change and growth, preventing you from overcoming your insecurity and preventing you from trusting in others.
So how do we cure fear? Dr. David J. Schwartz said it best when he said "Action cures fear". When you take action, you build confidence and annihilate fear! For example, minutes, hours or even days before a big presentation, some of us get extremely nervous. Just as you are about to step up to the stage, it feels nauseating, but once you begin,.....hey, it ain't that bad! Taking the first step is usually the scariest, after that, we just cruise through.
Waiting and worrying is what feeds fear and makes it grow, action stops feeding fear and terminates it.
When we face problems, we get stuck in the ditch until we take proper action. Hoping to get out of the ditch is a start, but hope gets you nowhere without action. If we don't take actions, we get stuck there forever. When you face fear, do not falter. Look at fear in the eyes and ask yourself, "Why am I afraid, and what actions can I take to overcome this fear?" Isolate your fear and take action. Do not run away or evade your fear. Face it, and overcome it or fear will come back to haunt you.
Below are a few types of fear and some possible actions to overcome it.
Embarrassment because of personal appearance - Improve it. Groom yourself better. By some better clothes, get a friend who is a good dresser to help you. Try to get a good haircut, it can make a big difference. Go to a gym if you want to tone your body.
Fear of failing an exam - If you have time to worry about that then use that time to study. Try not to start studying just days before exams. Make your preparations earlier. Also, if you fail to graduates or something, you can try again or pursue other interests that will provide for your future. Good grades aren't everything. Work on other skills that will help you in your career.
Fear of rejection - Afraid to get a date because you are afraid he/she might turn you down? Well, if you don't try, you won't know if he/she will reject or accept you. Don't worry too much about your baseless presumptions. The more times you try the better chances to find one that will agree. If you get rejected, don't grief too long. Move on, there are other fishes in the sea. Or just be friends, its always good to know more people right?
Fear of taking risks - You fear taking risks because you are afraid of failure. In life, it's about taking calculated risks. There can be no success without failure. We learn from failure to become successful. A successful person is not determined by how he makes risk free decisions, but how he overcomes obstacles and failures in his path.
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Visit http://www.rendedwings.com for more useful information pertaining various issues plaguing youths today. We have articles about coping with depression, suicide, drug abuse, introversion, troubled teens, low esteem and many more.
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Visit http://www.rendedwings.com for more useful information pertaining various issues plaguing youths today. We have articles about coping with depression, suicide, drug abuse, introversion, troubled teens, low esteem and many more.
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Top-level comments on this article: (2 total)Yes, this artical was very helpful, because no one was trying to sell you a book or a CD. It was just strait answers. But I think you need to explain it more, and give more examples. See, Im afraid of characters from a certain scary movie that I watched. You dont have that example on there. Explain HOW to take action. Otherwise, this article was very helpful. Thank you! :-)
I'm pumped! Recently I started saying hi to one attractive girl a day... I'm going to build on destroying my fear further by going to the mall and only leaving after saying "hi. How's it going?" to 50 people. In the past week at my gym I initiated my first conversation with an attractive girl I didn't know. I was scared badly to start the conversation but did and at the end she gave me her name without me asking, which I hear is a good sign. :-)
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